So, like any closeted ex-mormon (I really don't know any, obviously because they're usually still 'active' and act similar to 'TBMs', thats 'true believing mormons' for those of you out there who don't know the ex-mormon lingo like myself) none of my family has any even remote idea that I no longer believe, which is another story altogether, and therefore this conversation was a regular conversation any daughter would have with her father at any point in time growing up in Utah.
That he doesn't care what his kids do with their lives.
He doesn't care if they work at a fast food restaurant.
He doesn't care if they go to college.
He doesn't care if they get married.
He doesn't care when they have kids.
He doesn't care if they're a nurse, an accountant, or a zoo keeper.
He loves them no matter what they choose to do in life.
BUT.
Yes, there was a 'but' moment in here and you do realize what 'but' means right? It means, forget everything I just said because I'm putting a limit on my love and my ability to accept you as my child.
He wants them all to be in the church. Full fledged. Altogether Mormon. Happy Eternal Family.
Can you say zinger? Here I was thinking that he was going to just accept his children as they really are and whatever makes them happy makes them happy regardless of the content. Nope. I was excited that maybe, just maybe, I would eventually be able to slowly come out to my parents that I no longer believe in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Zing. Not a chance.
This conversation made me realize that it is not possible. I will not be leaving the church. Ever. (At least in the foreseeable future)
